No, she is not the "real hero", supporting is nice but it is just supporting. To be honest many men support their wives, I know countless families where the men is the provider and the women go to study for years or just shopping and sitting in cafes. There is nothing special about it and I don't understand why when a woman does it suddenly she is the "real hero".
Agreed. The notion that "Wow, any woman would've left this man for a guy who makes more, so this is an extraordinary relationship" sorta reinforces the assumption that men must be the breadwinner in any normal relationship.
In the context of a society with gender norms like ours, it is special and probably quite unusual. And typically in male-supported households the woman is responsible for housework and child care, which clearly wasn’t this developer’s primary occupation. We can certainly hope for a world where this sort of thing is commonplace, but it’s not the one we’re in right now.
What you are (intentionally?) not saying is that the rate of women participating in the workforce is steadily on the rise since decades while otoh the rate of men steadily drops.
