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Some people need to touch fire to know the feeling of getting burned.

I was one of those people.

Excellent tech income; zero savings other than a 401(k) I barely contributed into.

After an amazing meal at a burger place several years ago, I asked my wife about upgrading to a Model S. She figuratively sat me down (after we literally sat into the seats of our Model 3) and was more straight-forward with me than she had ever been prior to that moment.

"How much do we have saved? Oh, _we_ have basically nothing? Yeah, so I'm not saying no, but you need to fix that before we discuss this again."

I took it defensively in the moment, but not for long because I knew she was right. Building that nest egg became priority #1 since that talk.

That was in 2023. I saved a lot since then. It felt VERY VERY GOOD to look at my savings and say "You know, I could fuck right off for six months if I wanted to. I won't, but I could!" It completely changed my priorities at work.

Now, I've had to drain my savings twice now: once to secure a down payment for our house, and again for a major repair of said home (b/c I am strongly against treating our home as a credit card). Regardless, I chip away a good amount into several savings accounts every two weeks and am expecting to regrow the account within the next year. I can't wait to feel that feeling again!

 help



As someone who took that time off, don’t. Not unless you have a solid re-entry plan. The money was nice for raising our daughter but I’m out of runway and no way to recover. Do well at your job and be thankful to live such a luxurious life.

You are learning, but you haven't learned.

You didn't build a nest egg, you saved for a down payment.

You didn't rebuild your nest egg, you created a sinking fund for your home.

You praise yourself for not treating your home as a credit card, but your left hand is still borrowing money from yourself.

You've recognized there's an issue, but don't fool yourself into thinking you've done anything about it


This was my take too.

GP built an emergency fund, which is important, but then drained it twice for non emergencies.

A nest egg is a much larger tax advantaged holding that you don’t want to withdrawal from because you’ll have a massive tax hit. It’s also far more than a down payment, hopefully. GP had some low interest “savings” account at his bank. Poor wife, no pun intended :(


Thanks for your opinion and for your concern for my wife. She is quite happy, actually!

I have a 401(k) that I contribute to. I intend on contributing the yearly max starting next year.

Should I have contributed the annual max when I started working? Yes. I chose instead to pay off our student loans instead and enjoy life. I'm not a frugal person.


Thanks for your opinion.

Yes, I have a ways to go.

You're also right that these aren't nest eggs. I spent them on what I saved for!

Regardless, it's a start, especially for someone who never had a habit of saving before.


You've had to drain your savings twice since 2023?

Yes. Yet, the point was that I started saving in a much bigger way than I did before.



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